This is the transcript of the actual radio conversation of a U.S. naval ship with Canadian authorities off the coast of Newfoundland:

Canadian: Please divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid collision.

Americans: Recommend you divert your course 15 degrees to the north to avoid a collision.

Canadians: Negative. You will have to divert your course 15 degrees to the south to avoid a collision.

Americans: This is the captain of a U.S. navy ship. I say again, divert your course.

Canadians: No. I say again, you divert your course.

Americans: This is the aircraft carrier USS Lincoln, the second largest ship in the United States Atlantic fleet. We are accompanied by 3 destroyers, 3 cruisers and numerous support vessels. I demand that you change your course 15 degrees north. I say again, that is one five degrees north, or counter-measures will be undertaken to ensure the safety of this ship.

Canadians: This is a lighthouse … Your call.